*on the phone with police after reporting a murder* no you hang up first
I’m a nasty nigga like ill fuck you doggy style and spit in your ass and watch it slide in your pussy and fuck you brainless but I’m also sweet I’ll massage you and make you breakfast and hold you at night and remind you that you are the only one for me.
Eres el desmadre que mi vida necesita.
when did i get this fat
One time in sixth grade I was being bullied really badly, and this whole circle of people gathered around me and the girl that was bullying me, and she smirked and went ‘You dumb rich bitch.’ And everyone was like OOOOOOH and I stood there for a second before pulling 20 dollars out of my wallet, placed it in her hand, and said “Buy some better insults.” And I swear the entire lunchroom rioted.